Being a Dad!
A very big thank you to Gavin & Melissa Tolley for this article about being a brand new dad
What can I say? Being a dad is the most stressful, frightening, wonderful and rewarding thing that has ever happened to me. Not a minute passes by when I’m not thinking of my little girl, being a dad has turned me from being a normal sort of bloke who likes chatting about football and cars into some kind of super bore who would rather chat about his daughter’s poo consistency, how she’s coped with teething, her communication skills, how quickly she took her first steps etc etc.
Mia (my little girl) will be 2 in August, time has flown by, we’ve seen her change from this tiny little thing that seemed to be asleep most of the time to this little person who run’s about at break neck speed, who has developed her own little personality, who stands in front of the mirror posing, who gets the hump when she can’t get her own way, who’s just learning the art of sharing and always rewards her old dad with a big kiss when he gets home from work.
When we first had Mia my wife worried about all the important things – i.e. is she feeding properly, why isn’t she waking up in the middle of the night etc. While I was very laid back about the whole thing, I was more interested in making up silly nick names for her, or make up little songs for her while I tried to get her to sleep. It’s easy for me to say, but I think Mia has benefited by not having both parents stressing out all the time, let your partner do the stressing…you’ve got more important things to be thinking about – will they grow up to be a famous scientist or will they take the more artistic route and become a famous screen actor/actress.
Days turn into weeks and weeks into months, my little girl is growing up faster and faster. Me and my wife (Melissa) were both very lucky when it came to sleep, to this day we’ve never had a sleepless night through Mia (we’re both heavy sleepers and scoff temazepam like smarties). Being a new parent you naturally compare your child with other children…who’s going to be the first to sit up, who’s going to be the first to teeth, who’s going to be the first to crawl etc, I was the same, I wanted Mia to be the most advanced and developed baby within her circle…sounds ridiculous now but I guess it’s only natural. Looking back though it has gone far too quick, make sure you invest in a camera, it’s great looking back at how quiet and well behaved she was!
Every time I look at Mia I feel over whelmed with pride, I’m sure this happens to every new parent, when I held her for the first time I became very emotional and cried like a big girls blouse…I’ve been told this is normal though. I think it took about 3 months for me and Mia to really bond though, I came back from a work trip and hadn’t seen her for a few days, one of my duties is to bathe her, as I was getting her ready for her bath, I started blowing raspberries on her stomach and tickling her…she thought this was hilarious and started laughing like a drain, ever since then we always make time for tickle time.
Your wife/girlfriend will be carrying around baby for 9 months and will go through excrutiating pain during labour while you stand around like a spare part. OK you may have read baby magazines, you may have attended anti natal classes, you’re reading this website…your main job though during the pregnancy is take charge on the buying of the baby furniture and to stock baby’s wardrobe with clothes that they will hardly ever wear. I done this…spent an absolute fortune on designer baby furniture, all the latest gadgets…my motto being the more expensive the better. I think this made me feel I was contributing to the whole pregnancy thing. What a waste of money, relations you have never seen before will crawl out of the woodwork with gifts for the new baby, wait for a couple of months and then see what you need.Melissa (wife) has decided that we’re having another baby, I’m not sure if I’m ready though, Mia’s not yet 2, I still feel I’m only just getting use to her being around and I want to enjoy her growing up first.
If you’re a new dad or about to become a dad, remember to enjoy it, it really is a wonderful time, but try and get away from the friends and relations who keep knocking on the door to get a look at the new baby, go upstairs, lie on the bed with your wife/significant other and your new baby and look at the onderful family you have created…it really is the best feeling in the world.
Good luck!
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